Today is our 3 year wedding anniversary. I can honestly say that I love this stud more than I ever have before. That's the beautiful thing about love…it keeps growing. Whenever I hear about barely twenty-somethings getting engaged I think, "Whoa, they are babies!" Then I remember that I was 21 when we got married! I think we've done a lot of growing up in the past 3 years. Our wedding feels like yesterday and forever ago all at the same time. I'm so thankful as I look back today. I've learned so much being married to this hunk, but these are the lessons that stick out most in my mind today. Here's 3 things I've learned in the past 3 years of marriage...
Completely opening up to someone is harder than I thought.
This has been the most difficult part of marriage for me. I'm a recovering perfectionist, so it's engrained in me to hide my flaws and weaknesses. In marriage, those things come to light more than in any other relationship. I've had to learn to open up about how I feel, even if it might hurt the other person. That is very hard for me to do. I've learned that I need to be honest about my weaknesses or I will never grow in those areas. I love having someone I trust completely, but I don't always want to share the deep things in my heart. I like to hide them and keep them safe. Oh, but it feels so good to push past all that and open up. I'm sure I'll still be growing in this area for many, many years to come. God has grown my heart and knitted it so closely with my husband's. I'm incredibly thankful for that.
There is no limit to how much love can grow.
I thought I loved my husband when we got married, but how much I loved him then seems like nothing compared to now. Love really is like a tree with roots that grow deeper with each passing year. Our love keeps getting more rich and sweet. Sure, we have our challenges and times we drive each other nuts, but God helps us overcome and keep loving in spite of who we are. It is incredibly humbling to be loved like I am loved. Jonathan astounds me all the time by how wonderful he is as a husband. I don't deserve it. Time and time again, he selflessly puts aside his needs for mine. He leads me in a way I never knew I needed or wanted to be led. He shows me more of Christ. That deep, covenant-love has so intertwined it's roots in and around my heart that I almost can't imagine loving more. The most exciting part is that I know I will.
God knows what you need and when you need it.
I had no idea the things God had in store when we got married. 3 years ago we united our lives and committed to this journey together. We both had so many unfulfilled dreams. We made plans. God changed them. We started to go in one direction. He led us another. I had no idea how suited Jonathan would become as my travel partner. God has provided so many times through him. Looking back I see how perfectly the Lord has written our story. Each waiting period, every step of faith and all the fulfilled desires have been perfectly placed where they should be. I've seen that more in the past 3 years than in all my years prior.
All in all I'd say it's been the hardest and best 3 years of my life. I'm so looking forward to the many years to come. (I mean, with this hunk of a husband, who wouldn't? Wink, wink.)
I love you more than words can describe.