Hi, I'm Jennifer Blair.
There are few things I enjoy more in life than creating art. My aim is to create as a reflection of the Creator. Thanks for stopping by my blog. Here you'll find my recent work, glimpses into my life and the inspiration behind my art.
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If there is one thing motherhood has taught me, it is that my children learn more from what I do than what I say. If I find true enjoyment in something, they seem to enjoy it also. If I complain about something, I find they mimic my complaints later. They mirror the way I treat them, the way I talk to others, and the emotions I express. To my dismay, they often mirror my negative qualities along with the positive. “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree,” they say. And it’s true. So what kind of apples am I growing? What kind of tree am I?
There is a beautiful principle found in nature: life from death.
Just because it is beautiful doesn’t mean it isn’t hard. Death is painful. Even these stunning trees will watch every bloom die, every fruit wither, and every leaf fall. They’ll be left with a red scar where life once was. And yet, new life will come. Without the surrender to the death of what was there could never be another beautiful Spring.
When the soul is wounded, it needs care just the same as a wounded body. I’m learning this deeply. Jonathan has a large physical wounds from this, but my soul has invisible wounds. It needs care just like a broken down body. It needs rest and things that will do it good. A wounded soul needs the medicine of the Truth, for nothing brings comfort and healing like God’s Word. It needs quiet and stillness to heal. Most of all it needs the care of the Good Shepherd, the only one who can bring true healing.
On Sunday February 19th, 2013, my precious husband collapsed leading worship at our church, Awaken City. He said he felt something like a shockwave go down his spine. I was helping in the babies area that day, but someone came and got me pretty quickly. By a miracle of God’s grace a nurse with a cardiothoracic background and her husband who is a PA were on the front row, rushed to help him, and quickly called 911. He had symptoms of a stroke from what they could see, but something just seemed off to them. They hoped it wasn’t a dissection (more on what that is exactly later) but they suspected it might be the worst case scenario.
Have you ever seen something so beautiful that it took your breath away? I wish I could transport you all to the moment I took the photo above. The sky was on fire with the brilliant last rays of the sun, acting like a highlighter to the vibrance of the Aspen leave all around me. It’s one of the few moments I remember being truly awestruck. But I wouldn’t be able to see all of that immense beauty if not for something so small and seemingly insignificant: a seed.
For the past year or so I’ve been trying to get rid of stress in my life. I realized a while back that I am often choosing my stress. Now, with five kids (including twins) life can get stressful pretty quickly with just the normal day-to-day things! Even so, I’ve been trying to get at the root of my stress. It’s not good for my body, my family, or my walk with the Lord. After many months of examining, I believe the root of most of my stress comes when my priorities aren’t right.
“This job [of motherhood] has been given to me to do. Therefore, it is a gift. Therefore, it is a privilege. Therefore, it is an offering I may make to God. Therefore, it is to be done gladly, if it is done for Him. Here, not somewhere else, I may learn God’s way. In this job, not in some other, God looks for faithfulness.” (Elisabeth Elliot)
For months now I have been praying for a double-portion of the boldness my mom had in sharing the gospel...which is ultimately a request for more of God-Himself. As we have been discovering our calling here in Utah, I have desired that I would be bold when opportunities come may way, just like my mother (and your Amma) who has now gone to be with Jesus. I believe God has answered me, in part, with you two! I have indeed received a double portion.
Only God could have known and planned our family. As I look back to my days of longing for a home full of children, I’m grateful for His timing. I don’t understand exactly why children come when they do. Some are surprises, and some wait with longing for years and years. Some go through loss after loss. It doesn’t make sense to me, but it does make me grateful. I look at them, fully aware they are a gift and a reward I don’t deserve and did nothing to earn. I think scripture puts it perfectly:
“TWO! WHAT? No way…this can’t be real.” And yet, there they were: two perfect babies on the screen. They moved and kicked around. We had found out a few weeks prior that we were very unexpectedly expecting again. “Four?” I wondered, “the timing sure is crazy, Lord!” After all, we just moved our little family across the country, from the coastal South East to the mountainous West. I had trouble getting peace about being pregnant again so soon after having our son, Elias. We have still been adjusting and settling in out here, and now…what a ride we’ve been on in 2020! Then all of the sudden, baby #4, became #4 and #5! (To clue you guys in, twins don’t run in my family - and we were preventing at the time.)
As many of you know, my sweet mama met Jesus almost two weeks ago on January 27th, 2020. As we all sang “Build My Life” around her bedside, (My dad, all six kids, their spouses, all the grandchildren, and even her parents via FaceTime), she left our presence and entered the fullness of the presence of God. With our hands raised and tears in our eyes, we watched her finish her course with joy as we sang. As her last breath left her, she smiled. It’s moment I will never forget. We can only imagine the incredible reward she has now, forever home in glory with the God she loved and served so faithfully.
Happy 2020 from the Blair family! As we start the new decade, we are also sharing some big news! We are moving to Utah as missionaries/ church planters! We’ve been working towards this since God revealed His direction for us in May 2019, and will hopefully be packing up our lives to move by May of this year.
Why Utah? Why the sudden move cross-country?
Long story short: ten years ago, we were starry-eyed newlyweds, ready to pack our few belongings, leave Dothan, and head off to seminary. As it turned out, God had a different school in mind. We felt God had plans for us to be sent somewhere for building His Kingdom, but for the time He was leading us to stay, serve, and grow. So we put down roots, invested in ministry here (specifically at Ridgecrest Baptist Church), grew in faith, and grew a family. It's been a good, sweet, fruitful ten years.
This past Monday the world marked the advent of the Autumn season. It’s always been a favorite of mine, partially because my birthday is in October, but regardless there is just something refreshing about the crisp Autumn days after the heat of Summer. I grew up in Florida, so in other words, we don’t have much of an Autumn. I love it nonetheless. Even now living in South Alabama, we put out our pumpkins and wear our sweaters even though it is still in the 90s through most of October. We’re also in a new season for our family, in many more ways than one. We’re settling back into our home after the hurricane damage, and expecting our third baby (A BOY!) just before the Winter Equinox. It’s season full of change like the leaves.
No risk. No reward.
We’re often willing to take many risks in life. Financially we make that investment. Relationally, we reach out to that guy or girl we like. We send that text with our heart attached. We book that plane ticket. Interview for that job. Climb that mountain. Sign that mortgage. We know we might loose out or fall our face in the process of “risking it,” but we know what might be on the other side makes it “worth the jump.” Read a just about any self-help or business book, and you’ll find the message is unanimous: take a risk…you might fail, but get up and do it again until you make it. We know this “no risk, no reward” principle is true in life. We’re willing to take a risk on a lot of things in order to gain whatever it is we desire.
But when is the last time you took a risk in your faith? Jesus is pretty clear about the call to follow Him. It’s all or nothing. It’s complete surrender. And yet, we often act like we can choose the “safe bets” with God. It’s easy to be afraid that if we take that jump, He might have us do something crazy, you might look foolish, or it may involve suffering. Again, Jesus is upfront about the call: yes, it will most assuredly involve suffering, and He will probably take you somewhere you never imagined you’d be. He also uses the “foolish things to shame the wise.” (1 Cor. 1:27) But it’s the most sure risk there is! He says that risking it on Him produces eternal dividends. We can stop taking risks for our own little kingdoms and start taking risks for His. Maybe we forgot which kingdom lasts forever, or that our life here can count for something so much more than just for today or 30 years from now.
At the end of December I felt the urge to step away from the sphere of social media as I entered into the new year. I needed a sabbath for my mind, and to clear out extra clutter and noise. I have mostly found social media a positive place. It can be harnessed for immense good, foster beautiful connections, opens up great entrepreneurial opportunities, and help us reach further than ever before. In fact, you're reading this on a screen right now and I may not even know who you are. That's pretty amazing. I also had an online-based business for 5 years, and was so blessed to connect with people from all over the world. There is much to be gained from our online world, and yet I confess, it is easy to put too much importance on what happens online. I have often struggled with getting on and zoning out, consciously and unconsciously comparing myself to others, or caring too much about what I see and the little numbers on posts. Even if it is mostly positive, those positive things can still negatively affect my heart. I'm no psychologist, but I think a lot of people see themselves negatively affected by so much "connection" via screens and social media. For me personally, it was so refreshing to unplug. I reached for books, instead of scrolling on my phone. I had to ask friends what is going on in their lives, because I didn’t read about it online. I allowed myself to experience a lull during downtime, and found my mind quickly filled the space productively. I went about my life without knowing what everyone else was up to, and it helped me find deeper contentment in my ordinary. It was like a cloud lifted from my mind and my thoughts found more clarity. But even when I stepped back I knew I wouldn't stay away for very long. The nature of our world has changed, and it's all online. For better or worse.
This year I really don’t want to post about anything we’re doing for Valentine’s Day. It’s not that those things aren’t good, or that I don’t want to celebrate my wonderful husband or do fun things with my girls. But looking at so many posts gets to be too much sometimes. I don’t know were your click on this post fell in your feeds full of happy faces, lovely dates, crafted perfection or special gifts, and I just don’t want to be another one of those this year. Instead, I want to tell you a story about a time I messed up.
I had just made one of those sweet, heartfelt posts for a special occasion…you know, sort of like today. I was happy and feeling the love. Later that day, the same special person I wrote about said something and I took it the wrong way. I’d like to say I responded in a loving and gracious manner, but the truth is that I didn’t. In my pride, I responded selfishly. And I felt pretty awful about it afterwards. I wish I could say I repented right away as well, but again, I didn’t. Putting something kind and loving online is a lot easier than actually being kind and loving all the time. Of course, I’m not advocating that we should all share our mess-ups with the world online. It’s just that what we say online and what we do in person are sometimes different. I’m no more immune to my own humanity than anyone else, but I carried around the shame of my words the rest of the day. I felt the dichotomy between what I had said and how I had acted, and it felt like a chasm.
Worship probably isn't the top word that comes to someone's mind when thinking about a legacy. Words like heirloom, character, stories, and love might be more common. But have you ever thought about the fact that how (and who) you worship will also become part of our legacy?
Scripture says we should pass down the worship of God from one generation to the next:
“These things we have heard and known, that our fathers told us. We will not hide them from their children, but tell to the coming generations the glorious deeds of the Lord and his might, the wonders he has done. He established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers to teach to their children that the next generation might know them, the children yet unborn, and arise and tell them to their children, so that they should set their hope in God and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments.” (Psalm 78:3-4, a Maskil of Asaph)
Christmas was so sweet this year! It's hard to believe how much has changed. We had just found out that we were having another GIRL around Christmas last year. It felt like life was in an upheaval. It was beautiful for me to understand the reality of the Prince of Peace we celebrate in a deeper way this year. Our morning was pretty simple, with simple gifts (some are even old handmedowns -eek!) but the kids will never know unless they read this one day - and I doubt they will care! My mom always did such an amazing job making everything about Christmas morning so magical, and I love trying to do the same for my girls with the presentation of things.
This year has felt extra special to me. Eleanora is at such a fun stage where all of Christmas is magical and wondrous. Our Genevieve makes everything sweeter and is such a joy to add to our adventures. This year Jonathan and I thought that the kids (mostly Elle) would LOVE to go cut down a tree. It was our first time, and it was quite the experience! We had never been to a tree farm, and in the deep south it was interesting for sure. Sadly neither of the kids were in the best of moods, but it was fun nonetheless. This is what I love so much about taking photos. Images have the power to reshape our memories. Eleanora will not remember her little mood, and honestly neither will I probably. What we will remember is the joy from the experience and the big smiles on our faces when we pulled this tree in our living room. Now, we ended up with a "different than usual" tree called a Leland Cypress, which has actually turned so lovely!
Today is the day (almost 2 years in the making) that Jonathan and I release our first album, Heartbeat as Ashes & Heirs. In all honestly, I feel a great lack of words at the moment. Our family is in the midst of great sadness, loss and thankfulness for the preservation of life. One family member almost lost their life, a cousin was shot and killed, and my grandfather will meet Jesus very soon. As Jonathan's uncle underwent emergency heart-surgery Monday night, I was hit yet again with the title of our album - Heartbeat. The heart is such a fragile thing. To think that it simply stops beating and we are suddenly lifeless. One moment is all it takes. Here one second. Gone another.
Everyone loves surface things. It's easy to show what is on the top, the growing, beautiful things. We love to see what is blooming. We put it out there into the world, not necessarily in a bad way, but it's out there. We see it. Stuff. Achievements. Happy moments. Beautiful adventures. Snapshots and stories of what we can see and quantify. All the things that are beautiful. Our world is obsessed with what grows above the surface. Stay on social media long and you'll see things like "how to grow your platform" or ads saying "you need this" or carefully curated ways to get more likes and acceptance in this world. And it's all based on what you can see. Happiness is found in enrichment, enjoyable things, abundance, leisure, travel, a cute house, a cute family, a cute wardrobe, cool friends and just the right balance between killing it and exploring the world. (Among other things of course.) These things are the measure of success. Do what makes you happy and show everyone your wonderful life, with just a touch of real thrown in so we know it's legit.
It's hard to believe the immensity of the things I have yet to post here from Spring and Summer. Today I had to share a few of our adventures from Colorado this Spring. We flew out for my 1:1 workshop and spent a few extra days driving all over what felt like half of the state, which may or may not be true! We drove over to Crested Butte (where we had an anniversary session with Laura Nelson -she's amazing!) then to Telluride, Silverton, Colorado Springs and down to the Great Sand Dunes National Park. We saw as much as we possibly could in four days. I don't get to do as many adventures with my husband, so these memories are so sweet for me. We had a lot of time together in the car, talking about life and dreams. And bonus, we'll plan on using the memories that we created as album art for our upcoming album, which many of you probably don't know. Some of these places were inspiration for writing and have had a big impact on our lives. Travel is incredible that way. It's so refreshing to get away from the "normal" and experience something fresh, let it seep into who I am and harness what truths become vivid for everyday living. I wish I had more poetic words for these images, but that will probably have to wait for the music that goes along with them soon.
Exactly one month ago I entered into a month of rest from work (except for email checks once a week) and all social media. I knew I needed to do it, but to be honest, I had more than a little trepidation about what my days would look like without the things that usually fill them. I did not expect to be catapulted into an old way of life that felt like how I was meant to be living. It took me by surprise that I didn't miss the companion of constant distraction. (Because let's be real, with a little one running around I have plenty of that already.) In my foolishness, I hoped to be "productive" and "get a lot done" during this time. I wanted a more clarity about the next 6 months and hoped to gain new insight. I didn't expect to come out on the other side with even more questions and craving even more time for true rest. However, I did come to understand more of what real rest looks like and that rest revealed the true state of my heart.
What is the point of "making it" or "having a name" if it doesn't have deep-seeded meaning or lasting impact? I can't get this image out of my mind - of vast sandcastle kingdoms that won't last, that cannot be transferred to beyond the grave. I knew the views of the Great Sand Dunes in Colorado would be incredible, but it moved my heart in such a powerful way. I cannot escape the imagery and it's parallel to life. The sand seemed unending. Peak after peak continued as far as I could see. In a moment, the wind would come gusting through the enormous sand mountains and valleys, changing the landscape and reconstructing the best way to climb to the top. Does that not sound like our world? One moment success is xyz, the next week the world is different, changing the path to the top by something as small as an Instagram algorithm. What if it is all gone tomorrow? All the "names" and "fame" that has been constructed around a grand facade, all gone in a moment. What then when then great sandcastle kingdom has blown away, every piece small granule scattered in the wind?
Fear crept into my heart like the grass between my toes. Ever so cautiously my feet hit the ice cold stone, sending shocks of doubt coursing through my senses. "Take this step" I heard a whisper. I know it's right, but this was not the step I envisioned for my life. The grass is easier, I could go where I want and the path seems clear in my mind - green, flourishing, happy, wide open...The little stone seemed anything but where I wanted to go.
Just a stepping stone. Take the step.
I obeyed in faith, but my tiptoes revealed that my heart stepped begrudgingly. "You'll fall if you don't put your full weight on your feet." Trust. Jump to the next step. So I did.
That was nearly 6 years ago now.
"There are always flowers for those who want to see them." - Henri Matisse
Art has many forms, and one of the most lovely is floral artistry. Flowers are such beautiful, delicate things that only last for such a short while. They require great care and patience. My sweet friend Shannon from Fleur & Lumière is one of the most naturally talented floral designers I've met. She has a gift for seeing beauty and creating it from a messy array of options. A few weeks ago we met up, she creating as she does so effortlessly, and I merely watched, mesmerized by the process. Surrounded by the beauty of the ancient streets of St. Augustine, this is the story of how an artist creates...
This time of year brings both anticipation and dread for me, knowing that I will be forcing myself to review the year and evaluate all aspects of my life. It is necessary for anyone who wants to live with any kind of purpose in life, but that doesn't mean it's easy. The past two days of thought have been humbling, yet refreshing and encouraging. 2015 was a good year, but also a very challenging year. It is so easy to get weighed down with each days ins and outs and I often feel the weight of wearing so many different hats all at once. It's so important for me to step back and refocus on the big picture, critique myself and move forward into the new year. In order to live live with my utmost it is vital to celebrate the victories, find what can work better and dream even bigger for the coming year.
Barely grown, yet standing at the alter
We were so young then, all those years ago
White with innocence and green with youth
So much life to come - what did we know?